The Sculpture of the Month for June is an older piece from 2010 that speaks to my current state of mind and, to a large extent, what is going on in our world just now.It’s called Apocalypse of Self.
Apocalypse of Self
2010
Apocalypse is defined as “an event involving destruction or damage on an awesome or catastrophic scale.”
We usually think of an apocalypse as a society- or planetary-wide event. However, when our own lives change dramatically, making the future unclear, each of us can experience the fear and depression of an inner apocalypse. An event in my own life around the time I created this piece was such an “apocalypse of self.”
Although I had sold my habitat restoration business in 2007, I agreed to stay on the new owners’ payroll to help them set up their office and hire staff. However, I was still working there in 2011 when I had a terrible traffic accident that fractured several vertebrae in my neck. After this “apocalyptic” event, I spent most of the ensuing year in a neck brace and eventually underwent vertebrate fusion surgery.
I tried to continue working, but it quickly became apparent that the time had come to move on, and I resigned. Yet, I had no idea what would happen next, and this was a scary time. So I decided to take a retreat alone in the redwoods, staying in a yurt on some friends’ property near Santa Cruz, where I sketched and meditated for a week.
This started a period of transition to creating a new life. We remodeled and moved into our home in Santa Cruz, and I began to put a greater focus on my art.
I have experienced other such scary times of uncertainty in my personal life, and I’ve learned that the secrets to moving forward are 1) not letting the fear overwhelm you and 2) avoiding putting the blame on others. But, in the midst of such an apocalypse, like for the central figure in Apocalypse of Self, the world seems to be falling apart — with planets exploding in the sky and no firm footing on either land or water. He’s dressed in a military uniform, but he seems uncertain how to respond as his military way of relating to the world gets shattered. Only the companionship of his sage-like dog offers hope for the future.
We are experiencing a kind of apocalyptic moment in our world right now, with so many of our highest ethical values of governance getting violated, both nationally and internationally, in self-aggrandizement — either for money or for power over others. People everywhere feel scared, and many blame others in trying to relieve their fear, turning against their fellow humans and forming tribal associations based on wealth, sex, gender, race, politics, or nationality.
This approach gets stoked by social media, those in power profit off our fears, wars rage or become imminent, and mediation gets passed over in favor of escalation. Clearly, unless we start to focus together on our common needs again, we may not survive, either as nation or a species.
I and many others don’t know how to act just now to facilitate a harmonious future. It can feel deeply depressing on a daily basis to not have a an effective way to move forward. I am waiting… waiting… for some movement or individual or event to provide the insight we need to move in a positive direction, but the skies keep exploding with new challenges to what we know in our hearts is right.
As we continue to face our sense of fear and inadequacy in this apocalyptic moment, let us all commit to sharing any manner of effective action that comes to us for removing self-absorbed, power-hungry people from power and beginning to cooperate for our mutual benefit again.
I’d love to hear what this sculpture evokes for you.Pleas reply to share your thoughts with me.
https://shorturl.fm/6pIw8